The further adventures of an earthbound alien

So one quarter of my family are in Sin City.
Half of us are in Traverse City, with friends,
and I’m here in… what ever the nickname for this place is. (Sing City?) What’s next for the traveling Hughesberry’s? That’s a darn good question. You know, I’m really glad you asked that. That is one of the best questions you have EVER asked me. I think you’re finally coming around. You keep asking questions like that and together we’ll have a pretty good blog.
Here’s why I’m in Singapore and, roughly, the way it was all supposed to work. I help a studio here knock out a pilot episode. It will be animated in the Philippines and edited in London. Then on April 3rd we sell it to all the people who have television stations all around the world. For those of you who don’t know the animation process as it usually goes (and that includes some of you actually in animation!) here’s a simple way to look at it. Let’s say I’m building a house to sell for a big investor. I go to the architect and tell him what I want. He draws up some plans that I approve. The architect and I find a builder and we start construction. When the house is finished I hire a designer to fill it with all those little things that make a house a home, like paint, pots, pans, sofas, ping pong tables and stuff. Then we go to the house selling convention and sell it with the promise of 25 more of equal value.

So now, picturing arriving at the architect’s office and instead of a team of 12 or so you find 2 working at the same drafting table with a single black crayon. You up the production crew to 4 and get another crayon. You are reminded by the investor that this had better be, “the best home ever built in the history of homes”. As the plan is being drawn you are told to send the finished parts of the plan to the Builder so that they can start building right away. Against your better judgment, you rip the plan into 27 strips and send them to the builder piece by piece, as they are finished. (With the understanding that the builder will start building as soon as each of the finished strips of the plan come in.)

Things seem to be flowing now, so you decide to visit the builder and see how they are doing with the 27 strips that they should have tapped together into one plan. They should be about a third of the way to completing the house. When you arrive at the building site you find that there are no builders, just the supervisor. You also find that there’s no lumber, no nails, hammers, measuring tape, nothing. Oh, the lot’s been cleared, but little else has been done. Good news though, the next day the builders start to trickle in and ask where their hammers are. I also suspect that they’ve never built anything before.

That’s where I am right now. I have no home for the home show in April. I may just have only the front porch and the living room to show the buyers. After the home show, and depending on whether we sell anything, I get to decide if the architect and the builder are worthy to build 25 more homes. So who knows where I’ll be in April, still in Singapore? Or do we pack up and move to China? Or Korea? Or London? Or India?

This is what I’ve been dealing with while being chased by monkeys and tormented with exotic bathroom facilities. I have all this to do while I try to find something as simple as a potato peeler in a country that doesn’t peel potatoes. To add to this frustration, any bump in the schedule will delay the arrival of my wife and kids. I can’t begin to tell you, you intelligent question asker, how this makes me feel. I never really understood why anyone would come to another country and turn into an “ugly American.” But, NOW I FREEKING GET IT!

Whish me luck.

Next time: Once more into the breach dear friends…